Bayonetta Demo

Although it's a slightly inferior port of a game built for the Xbox 360, I downloaded the Bayonetta "First Climax" demo from the Japanese Playstation Store. The result? I came.

I'll be honest. I have no idea what is going on during the demo and I don't care. The game is on a level of cray cray that I had never thought possible. Somewhere between the copious amounts of sexual innuendo that borders on ridiculous and voice acting that takes itself far too seriously for comfort, I found myself having a blast being a super stylish witch in a surreal steampunk world.

Bayonetta is Hideki Kamiya's vision of the G.I. Joe Baroness on the creamy crack. This woman doesn't hold back. While the character design was done by a woman, Kamiya gave Bayonetta a cool-yet-playful attitude to ensure that this femme fatale would be nothing like a traditional heroine. It's almost guaranteed that Bayonetta will be added to my list of favourite characters ever, since Kamiya is the man who created Devil May Cry's Dante and Resident Evil's Leon Kennedy.

The game is something that needs to be experienced to be understood. Imagine Devil May Cry. Okay, now imagine it being fun. The battles in Bayonetta are frantic and furious for the most part, but gravity can turn upside down and time can slow down. There are several unpredictable diversions and possibilities you'll come across, ensuring that nothing gets monotonous. Best of all, the gutsier you get, the game will reward you accordingly. The difficulty has several accessibility settings as well, so anyone can enjoy the game.

Quick rundown on some of the insanity:

Hair of mass destruction

When it isn't her clothing, it can summon demons from hell.
Heck, even Bayonetta herself can transform.

Guns on my shoes?

It's more likely than you think.
And the guns have names: Parsley, Sage, Rosemary, and Thyme.


She provokes enemies by saying things like, "You want to touch me?"
Then again, she also can turn a weapon into a stripper pole.

I'm your little butterfly

Bayonetta becomes a butterfly in mid-air, like her shadow's shape.
And she can fight like a samurai, too.

Cosplayer's nightmare

Beehive hair, clocklike brooch, cat earrings, and crescent moons.
Such greatness can only be achieved with developer help.

Angels are the enemy

We're not talking Angels in America.
More like Legion without the inevitable terrible.

What is this i dont even

Bayonetta likes to eat candy. She has roses for blood.
And the enemy lock-on effect is a pair of lips.

And yet...

She wears glasses.
Everything can be taken off, except for the glasses.
They're sacred.

Game Data
Title: Bayonetta
Genre: Action
Developer: Platinum Games
Platform: PS3, Xbox 360
Release: 2009

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